Sunday, February 26, 2006

An Open Letter to the Lame Ass Motherfucker Who Hit My Car Today and Drove Off

Dear Steve,

Surprise asshole, I know your name, I know who you work for and today is not your lucky day. If, after your boss gets the phone call letting him know that you hit one of your store's customers, you have some extra free time on your hands; I pray that in the future you consider how nice it is to grind your truck door 12 inches across anyone's passenger side door, most especially a minivan. I would also suggest that you not drive off in hopes that owner did not catch who you are, because I did see you as I parked. I saw you and your Science Diet promo materials you were removing from the store, so, I know you are a rep for the damn company. Thank the heavens criminals like you are none too bright. Yeah, you're a criminal, fucktard.

The manager of Petco is not amused, the cops are not amused, my insurance company is not amused and somehow, I find that I am, now, very amused. I would like to see the look on your face when you boss calls you into his office tomorrow in the am. Have a cuppa Joe on me asshole, because god knows the Insurance company is going to take pity on you.

Kiss my ass you son of a bitch and have a nice day.

Denice
posted by Ditsy Chick @ 9:06 PM |

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